I'm not sure when it comes to him, but I know that I only know him as "Naoya" and not "Cain". I don't want him to be burdened by something that he did that I can't even really remember. I don't hate him for what happened because I can't remember it, and even if I know Abel was mad, I don't believe Abel hates him for it either.
[ One of the dearest people in Maruki's life, in any reality, in every reality, is plagued by lifetimes of memories too. He gets it, in that way, but... ]
It may not be something you can fix or undo, Kazuya. The best thing for both of you might be just to focus on proving that to him going forward. Hopefully it will sink in.
[ That there's no way for him to fix it. This Naoya may not be his Naoya, but he's important to him all the same. Someone he knows on a level that might be unfathomable to someone else, due to not only their history, but their connection of shared history going right back to the beginning of humanity, as it were.
He can't handle there being nothing for him to fix. Nothing for him to help with, for someone so important to him. ]
He'll never not see me as Abel. I know it, and as long as he's me, Naoya will be trapped. I can't accept that there's nothing I can do about it to help him.
[He's right. There's no way for for him to fix what's already happened, but that doesn't stop him from wanting to fix the problem it poses now.]
What you think is the best way to approach it, then?
[He'll do what he's always done. Gather information, as much as he can. Seek opinions that both align and differ from his own, and make the best choice he can. Naoya deserves at least that.]
Keep making it clear that he's only Naoya to you. And that Naoya is entirely separate from Cain.
[ The hand not holding his empty iced coffee raises. ]
I'm sure you're already doing that. This is something that's important to you, I can tell. It isn't revolutionary. Just... Keep at it. Even when it's difficult, or frustrating, or painful. It may take a long time, but it will take effect eventually.
[It's true. It's nothing that he hasn't been doing, mostly. But... It makes Naoya happy when Kazuya lets him call them brothers. When he lets him pretend he's Abel. And he's been through so much, isn't it worth it to suffer just a little to let him have that? To pretend for a moment that the brother that Cain so vehemently cherishes is still around?
All Kazuya has are memories, faint, faded, and fleeting. Like trying to remember a waking dream.]
I'll keep it in mind. It makes it a little difficult, when in his reality I've apparently not only betrayed him, but hurt him gravely. I can't even imagine why I'd do something like that, when all I want to do is make sure he's happy.
[The statement seems to perk him up a little, if only because he's always interested in hearing about Maruki and his on-goings. Though if it made him think of him and Naoya...]
Someone from my reality arrived. Someone incredibly important to me, at that. For whatever reason, though, he doesn't know me and never has.
[ He said it was funny. It really isn't funny at all. ]
I thought of the strange, differing times that you and Naoya come from immediately. Just as it's impossible for you to imagine a reality in which you would betray him, it's impossible for me to imagine a reality in which my friend and I never met. Altered realities, I suppose... It's unsettling.
That's not funny at all, you know... That's really sad. To not have someone you care about so much know you... I'd be devastated.
[From Yuzu, his childhood friend. To Atsuro, who he cared about and was readily supported by, no matter what...
If either of them showed up, and didn't know who he was... It'd be rough.]
I'm really sorry that it's happened to you. But... If you were important to each other before, there's no reason for that to not be the case again, right? Maybe your bond will be stronger for it, too. At least, I hope so.
[ It always strikes him just how thoughtful Kazuya really is.
And he's right on the money, too. It was devastating. It is devastating. Every time his mind quiets and wanders, it returns to the way Akira looked at him , rightly distrustful of a stranger. ]
Thank you. I agree, of course – we'll go through things here that we never could have dreamed of in our true reality... realities, I suppose. [ Oh, he hates it. ] It will be a wholly unique relationship. Yours and Naoya's could be, too.
[He moves without really thinking, his hand that has nothing in it reaches up, gently patting Maruki's head like he would if he were to console Yuzu, like if he were to comfort Atsuro. It's an act done without really thinking, but a measure of closeness all the same.
Without really realizing it, Maruki has become an invaluable friend.]
Even if it's not the same friendship, it'll be just as important. I know it.
[He won't focus on Maruki's comment about him and Naoya, if only because it seems like an attempt to detract the conversation from himself, and Kazuya wants him to know that he does genuinely hope things work out between him and his important friend.]
hehe we can wrap here or on yr reply unless you have more !! PREPS FOR EVENT
Unexpected, to say the least. Maruki's eyes lift to watch the hand, lips parted into a silent, dumb little oh!
They fall back to Kazuya's face as he does his best to comfort, placate, reassure–
And Maruki can't help but laugh. Not at him. Not at anything, really. Just– it's funny. That there are people who treat him like this at all. He never would have thought.
He reaches out and ruffles a hand through Kazuya's hair in return, playful and affectionate. ]
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[ Well, that does complicate matters, doesn't it? ]
So, with regards to your original question... Is Naoya-kun interested in separating his past from his future, or are you interested in it for him?
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[But the curse lingers anyway. Why? It's cruel.]
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It may not be something you can fix or undo, Kazuya. The best thing for both of you might be just to focus on proving that to him going forward. Hopefully it will sink in.
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[ That there's no way for him to fix it. This Naoya may not be his Naoya, but he's important to him all the same. Someone he knows on a level that might be unfathomable to someone else, due to not only their history, but their connection of shared history going right back to the beginning of humanity, as it were.
He can't handle there being nothing for him to fix. Nothing for him to help with, for someone so important to him. ]
He'll never not see me as Abel. I know it, and as long as he's me, Naoya will be trapped. I can't accept that there's nothing I can do about it to help him.
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[ Maruki offers him a smile, small but genuine. ]
Come on. Do you really think I'd tell you that you can't help him at all? Of course you can.
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What you think is the best way to approach it, then?
[He'll do what he's always done. Gather information, as much as he can. Seek opinions that both align and differ from his own, and make the best choice he can. Naoya deserves at least that.]
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[ The hand not holding his empty iced coffee raises. ]
I'm sure you're already doing that. This is something that's important to you, I can tell. It isn't revolutionary. Just... Keep at it. Even when it's difficult, or frustrating, or painful. It may take a long time, but it will take effect eventually.
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All Kazuya has are memories, faint, faded, and fleeting. Like trying to remember a waking dream.]
I'll keep it in mind. It makes it a little difficult, when in his reality I've apparently not only betrayed him, but hurt him gravely. I can't even imagine why I'd do something like that, when all I want to do is make sure he's happy.
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You know, something funny happened to me recently that made me think of you and Naoya.
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What was it?
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[ He said it was funny. It really isn't funny at all. ]
I thought of the strange, differing times that you and Naoya come from immediately. Just as it's impossible for you to imagine a reality in which you would betray him, it's impossible for me to imagine a reality in which my friend and I never met. Altered realities, I suppose... It's unsettling.
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[From Yuzu, his childhood friend. To Atsuro, who he cared about and was readily supported by, no matter what...
If either of them showed up, and didn't know who he was... It'd be rough.]
I'm really sorry that it's happened to you. But... If you were important to each other before, there's no reason for that to not be the case again, right? Maybe your bond will be stronger for it, too. At least, I hope so.
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And he's right on the money, too. It was devastating. It is devastating. Every time his mind quiets and wanders, it returns to the way Akira looked at him , rightly distrustful of a stranger. ]
Thank you. I agree, of course – we'll go through things here that we never could have dreamed of in our true reality... realities, I suppose. [ Oh, he hates it. ] It will be a wholly unique relationship. Yours and Naoya's could be, too.
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Without really realizing it, Maruki has become an invaluable friend.]
Even if it's not the same friendship, it'll be just as important. I know it.
[He won't focus on Maruki's comment about him and Naoya, if only because it seems like an attempt to detract the conversation from himself, and Kazuya wants him to know that he does genuinely hope things work out between him and his important friend.]
hehe we can wrap here or on yr reply unless you have more !! PREPS FOR EVENT
Unexpected, to say the least. Maruki's eyes lift to watch the hand, lips parted into a silent, dumb little oh!
They fall back to Kazuya's face as he does his best to comfort, placate, reassure–
And Maruki can't help but laugh. Not at him. Not at anything, really. Just– it's funny. That there are people who treat him like this at all. He never would have thought.
He reaches out and ruffles a hand through Kazuya's hair in return, playful and affectionate. ]
I hope so. Come on, let's head back.